“Success isn’t always about greatness. It’s about consistency. Consistent hard work leads to success. Greatness will come.”Dwayne Johnson
I’m tired. All the time, tired. I really think it is just the grind. Waking up everyday to go to the same job and do the same routine, everyday. I don’t mean to gripe, I am grateful for a job that allows me to provide for my family, but I am not cut out for a 9 to 5.
I work for a bank and I make enough money to live paycheck to paycheck. That is my own fault. Had I made smarter decisions earlier in life, I would not be in the situation I am in now. A situation where I can’t just up and leave my job because it would put my family at risk.
I am changing. I have learned a great lesson – consistency. If you start something, be there a year from the time you start it. No matter what – be there a year from the time you start. That is one purpose of this blog, to see if I can be here a year from now, still writing, still sharing.
I get bored. I get depressed. I start drinking soda (my version of alcohol), because I can’t deal with the day to day. I forget to be grateful, I forget to grind, I gain weight, I quit. That is the cycle I am trying to change.
One thing I have learned is that I can no longer do it on my own. I suppose I have always known this, but it is starting to sink into my soul. At the beginning of the year, I wanted to change. I was 40 lbs overweight – I took my time and lost 10. Then I got extreme with my diet and lost 10 more. Then I got feeling good and I quit. I did not mean to quit, but I stopped. I stopped because I was not accountable to anyone. Outside of the weight loss, I did not have anything that I was shooting for, no skin in the game. Just me and a resolution. Another failed resolution.
I was thinking about this yesterday, as I have now gained most of the weight I lost back, and I feel tired. I wake up everyday to go to a job that I am not passionate about, do enough to get by (and then some), to then drink soda, eat like garbage, and watch TV. That is my day.
I joined direct sales, so I could feel again, even if it was rejection. I started taking the triangle of health to at least get my nutrition to counter the garbage I eat. It has made me feel good and wanting to stop eating and drinking bad things, but I am addicted. How am I supposed to convince anyone that what I am doing is awesome, if I don’t look the part. I don’t look like I believe it can change me.
I thought about all of this and came to the conclusion that I need skin in the game. So I went to the gym that is less than a mile from my home. I did this because I have told myself I can exercise on my own for my entire life, and here I am. I never take that walk around the block I intend to do everyday. I don’t do the 10 pushups, or walk the stairs for a half hour like I say I will. I lie to myself, every time.
Much like when I signed up for direct sales, I told them I do not need to be shown around or sold anything, just show me where to sign and let’s get going. It took less than 15 minutes and I was walking on a treadmill. After that I was on other cardio machines. I stayed for an hour. Then I came back the next day and did weight training for an hour. No distractions, no excuses, just a promise to myself that I will be there a year from now.