Self-Sufficiency Part II

“Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost.”

Romans 15:13 KJV

Continuing my diary entries from July 2014 when I quit my job. Below I was joking when I said I was fired, I certainly walked away. I was scared at the time and this was my raw emotion in the moment. It’s interesting to look back and see that I was feeling the same emotions as I was at the beginning of this year: broken, lost, unhealthy, forgetting God, and having hope.

July 2014:

Today is a new day. A blank canvas. I have the world in front of me. I am bound no longer to a cubical. I quit my job. I may have been fired. It doesn’t matter. I now have choices. Options.

My first step. My first choice is gratitude. I have an abundance of things that I am thankful for. My wife and children. My friends. My health. My creativity. My life.

None of these things were dependent on my job. My job was not my identity. It was not what made me happy. In fact, it made me sick: physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Why? I stopped being grateful.

I forgot God. I forgot about what makes me happy. I lost focus on my family. I traded experiences with them for an occupation. I pursued money. I acquired ‘stuff.’ I became miserable. I lost myself. And I wanted more. More of anything because I didn’t have enough.

No longer. I can see again. Now that I have nothing, I can finally see again. How much I am blessed. How much I have to live for. The adventure that is in front of me. The challenges that await me. I love them all. I’m excited by them. I need them to grow. I am thankful for them. I am abundant in God’s love. I have hope.

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